The Five Most Common Relationship "Mistakes"

We all find ourselves in a relationship at some point in our lives, and there are certain mistakes we make that leave us feeling unfulfilled, spark conflict, lead to breakups, or make us think, “I’ll never find the right person.”

I say “mistakes” with a wink because they’re opportunities for us to find ourselves. 😉

Relationships are such an exciting learning ground where we can discover so much about ourselves if we’re willing to take an honest look.

Here, I’ve summarized the 5 most common mistakes—or learning opportunities 😉—in relationships, and I’m sure you can take a lot away from them, even if you’re currently single. After all, we’re always in a relationship with ourselves.

Mistake 1: You expect your partner to make you happy.

We often enter relationships with the expectation that our partner will make us happy, instead of asking ourselves what makes us happy.

A relationship works best when both individuals take responsibility for their own happiness.

Take an honest look at the expectations you have of your partner. If you’re single, reflect on what you expect from a partner in a relationship.

It’s not your partner’s job to make you happy—that’s your job. The better you feel about yourself, the more you can give to the other person.

Mistake 2: You make your partner responsible for your emotions.

No one creates your emotions. You create them through the way you interpret your experiences. Realizing that your partner isn’t responsible for your emotions is a gift because it means you have control.

Your partner may trigger certain feelings, but they’re not the cause. Instead of blaming them, take a step back and ask yourself why you’re interpreting situations the way you are.

Partnerships help us recognize where we still need to heal. Often, triggers aren’t about the current situation but stem from our past or childhood.

A fulfilling relationship requires looking inward and being willing to work on yourself rather than holding your partner responsible for your well-being.

Mistake 3: You want your partner to be exactly the way you envision them.

We all have ideas about how our partner should be or act.

This mindset blinds us to the person we truly love. Relationships aren’t about things always being easy—they’re about navigating conflicts together and honoring each other’s differences.

When we try to mold someone into our ideal, it’s not love. Love is about truly seeing the other person, setting aside our ego, and getting to know them authentically, with all their good and bad sides.

Mistake 4: You don’t allow yourself to show your true self in the relationship.

A common mistake is trying to fit a certain image, believing we’ll only be loved if we behave a certain way.

The most healing thing in the world is realizing that you’re most loved when you show every side of yourself and embrace that you’re perfect just as you are.

When you start living authentically, you give your partner permission to do the same—and that’s where the magic happens. ✨

Mistake 5: You carry your past relationship into your new one.

We rarely take the time to process and make peace with a past relationship, which means we carry negative beliefs into the new one, affecting its energy.

To live in a fulfilling relationship, we must let go of the expectation that our partner must do something for us. Instead, ask yourself: What are YOU willing to give to this relationship? Who do YOU want to be in it?

Our past relationships don’t just involve former partners—they also include childhood and the relationship dynamics modeled by our parents. By questioning and healing your beliefs about relationships, men, women, and sexuality, you create a new definition for yourself.

The Key to a Fulfilling Partnership

The key to a fulfilling partnership isn’t finding the right partner—it’s breaking down the barriers within yourself that have kept you from fully experiencing love.

When you do this, you’ll either attract the right partner into your life, or your existing relationship will transform for the better—simply because you’ve changed.

Are you interested in learning more about relationships and how to create a happy and fulfilling partnership? In my new online relationship course, I’ll teach you how to dissolve limiting beliefs about relationships and yourself, love yourself deeply, and manifest a happy and fulfilling partnership.

I hope these 5 tips have inspired you and given you a new mindset about relationships and partnerships. 💞

Lots of love & light,

Fee